Sou contra as revistas femininas. Sempre fui e se alguém me emprestar uma, nem uma vista de olhos lhes dou. As “Activa”, “Lux Woman”; “Happy”, são uma treta. Para além de nos venderem a ideia que o magro e o bronzeado é que é, dizem-nos tretas do género: “Como satisfazer o seu parceiro”, “Como melhorar o sexo oral” e, o que as revistas femininas NÃO dizem…para mim, é o mais importante. Elas defendem a Teoria de que o tamanho não importa… Não importa a quem?
Se calhar não conta para as assexuadas e para as que fazem questão de terem uma vida activa mas só com o amante. Obviamente que quando se gosta de alguém, quando se está apaixonado, isso passa para segundo plano e gostamos da pessoa pelo seu todo e blá, blá, blá, mas bolas, que conta, conta!
Alguma vez ouviram alguma mulher a dizer:
“Epá, o João tem uma pila de 14cm e eu acho o máximo!”
“Oh miga, o meu Mário mede 13cm e eu não preciso de mais nada…fico satisfeita!”
Eu nunca ouvi este diálogo. Ouvi muitas coias de amigas que não posso transcrever mas reti uma há uns anos, “Vocês tinham razão: o tamanho conta mesmo!”.
Eu tenho uma teoria nada femininista, ou então bastante feminista já nem sei: um gajo com uma pila grande não precisa de fazer muito. Basta que ela funcione e não vá abaixo. Os olhos comem, a boca come, o resto come e se a mulher não for daqueles que fica a pensar se o tecto precisa de uma nova pintura, esse homem até pode ser uma nódoa na cama, basta que ali esteja  de membro em riste!
Homens do meu país, desculpem-me a franqueza e não me detestem mas é a minha opinião sexista e machista/femininista…sim porque eu sou modernaça mas tenho às vezes tenho mente de gajo machista!

3.603 thoughts on “O que as revistas femininas NÃO dizem…

  1. Bem… eu não sei que raio andas tu a ver, mas 14 cm não é pequeno. É normal… ahahah

    Quanto ao resto, sim, concordo. Os olhos comem. Mas discordo que os que a têm grande pouco tenham de fazer. A pior coisa que encontrei na cama achava isso mesmo… que por ser avantajado podia simplesmente estar ali e eu morria de tédio!

  2. Bruno Miguel: Obviamente que o sexo não é só chegar e enfiar…eu disse que uma mulher com um gajo com uma pila grande, safa-se mais e melhor do que com um de pila pequena. Basta a gaja ser esperta.

  3. E mais: não creio mesmo que seja importante desde que não se caia no extremo. Claro que demasiado pequeno não satisfaz… mas demasiado grande dificulta.

  4. S: 14cm é normal? Onde? A média dos pénis portugueses é 15/16cm. Logo, 14 é pequeno. 🙂
    Claro que tens razão, ter pila grande não chega, mas le o que disse ao Bruno Miguel.

    Patife: O Patife é o Rei das CB!

  5. É pá…muito bom.

    Mas e se um gajo de pila pequena for um fodão do caraças e o gajo de pila grande nem beijar souber?!?!?!

    Pelo que dizes mais vale pinocares com um vibrador catita do que com um gajo só por ter pila grande…não precisas de correr com ele no final da queca!!!
    LOL

  6. Dora,
    Gosto destes teus post´s.
    Sim, é óbvio que o tamanho conta, aqui a questão é saber o que é grande e o que é pequeno.
    Eu acho que quando é de tamanho "normal" o resto faz muito mais diferença…o saber beijar, o saber acariciar, o acto em si conta muito.
    Mas sim, uma pila pequena, mesmo pequena nem comichão faz…

  7. Tambem tenho uma teoria. Não existem caralhos grandes, existem caralhossauros. Os caralhossauros são bonitos de se ver e optimos para o broche, mas as mulheres têm medo de os enfiar nas bordas pois pode ocorrer o efeito areia movediça e o bicho enterrar-se e não sair mais.

  8. De informar, que adorei ler linha a linha. Curta e directa. E por vezes não é preciso muito mais que isso. Vendem uma ideia. Verdade. Nem sempre correcta. Mais do que correcto. Pelo menos eu pessoalmente as que compro é para ver mais aquilo que se passa no mundo in or out que outra coisa..

    Beijokas****

  9. Epá, eu identifico-me contigo da mesma maneira que te identificas com as frases nicola! ahah. Se a primeira impressão não impressionar, então é bom que a saiba usar. mas se à primeira vista a coisa for vistosa, epá, é meio caminho andado, para não dizer que estamos a um passinho da meta.

    Quanto às revistas, eu consumo. Mas juro que passo a ser assídua da que ousar fazer capas com os gajos (sem ser os labregos strippers)! É a minha luta! Adivinhem: eles querem ver elas e elas querem ver… sim, eles!

  10. hummmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    na minha experiencia pessoal posso garantir que nada disso importa, mas sim um todo.
    o caralho isoladamente de pouco ou nada serve é como o vibrador assim como aquela gaja com um corpinho que todo bom e um grande par de mamas da nada vale se na hora da verdade ficar a olhar para o teto.

    P.S. ainda procuro a medida para medir a minha!

  11. Caia: A habilidade é o truque 🙂

    Pedro: O vibrador catita não tem língua…para que achas que precisamos dos homens? 🙂

    Ulisses: Qualquer dia faço um sobre mamas,pronto 🙂

    aespumadosdias: Isso é outra coisa curiosa. Não há mulher nenhuma que diga "Ai tens a pila muito pequena, querido". O gajo com um micro-pénis nunca vai dizer que a namorada o acho pequeno. Nós não dizemos 🙂

    Marta: Disseste tudo. Há beijos tão bons que já nem interessa o tamanho da pila…bem, não vamos exagerar! 🙂

    Rui Caldeira: Ias tão bem até dizeres "bordas". Ehehehehe! Disseste tudo: são bonitos de se vere, sim senhora. Mas olha que nm todas as senhoras são assim, senão o que era feito dos filmes de gag?

  12. Sissy: Para isso temos as revistas de fofocas. Não compro mas assim que vejo uma na mão de alguém , peço logo para ver 🙂

    Salsa: Mas isso é óbvio, o que conta é o todo, mas isto era uma sátira :-)E se não fossem assim as gordas e as feias não fodiam.

    Marta Inês: Só se for pela moda…

  13. Eu prefiro um homem com um pénis pequeno mas que saiba fazer sexo do que um homem com um pénis grande que não sabe.
    Agora lembrei-me dum amigo que me disse que preferia uma mulher com peito pequeno e boa na cama em vez de uma com peito grande e má na cama, é que estas pensam que basta estar lá e pronto, não é preciso fazer mais nada.

    É a mesma coisa para as mulheres, só que trata-se de outra parte do corpo.
    Podemos ficar a babar com uma pila grande/mamas grandes, mas na hora H… não é bem assim.

  14. S. – 14 cm é normal? Epá que feliz que eu fico

    Dorinha, não podia estar mais de acordo contigo, excepto na frase "um gajo com uma pila grande não precisa de fazer muito". Tudo bem que quanto maior e grossa, menos jeitinho tem que ter na anca que o membro por si já faz metade do trabalho, mas isto não é só enfiar e zing-zing-zing. Imagina um homem virar-se pra ti, com pau de meio metro em pleno fulgor e dizer "Dois minutinhos de festa e tá arrumado". Acho que não gostavas né?

    Tenho cá pra mim que o tamanho importa mas os trabalhadores, mesmo os de pila mais pequena (os tais 14 cm que são normais) se safam bem e dão conta do recado. Não pode é ser micro-pénis, senão não deve ter piada nenhuma…

    Kiss

  15. Nox Lilin: Eu compreendo o que dizes e ainda bem que deste o exemplo das mamas. Para um "tits pervert", a gaja basta ter mamas grandes que ele curte à maneira dele. Só isso é a festa. Entendes?

    Noya: Achas que não sei isso? Ehehehe! E olha, quanto mais madura fica a mulher, mais isso quer ao invés da própria penetração.

    MRPereira: Alguém que me entenda! 14cm é pequeno. Claro que não basta tê-lo grande mas há a parte fetiche e essa conta muito 🙂

  16. Isso não é bem assim. Ejaculação precoce não depende do tamanho do membro. "Ah é enorme, mas são só 2 longos minutinhos de diversão." parece-me uma reclamação que possa existir na vida real.
    Na minha opinião, uma mulher bem "aquecida" (seja com treta, sedução, dedo, língua, apalpação, etc) não se vai importar muito com o tamanho, excepto se for micro claro.

    Se fôssemos todos pelo tamanho, havia aí muita mulher que tava lixada por causa das mamas. Certo?

    Abraço,
    LDS

  17. LDS: Há coisas que não vou explicar mas tenho noção daquilo que disse. Obviamente que quando está excitada, o tamanho pode não interessar. Mas tu sabes a pica que dá roçares-te num gajo com um pénesito maior que o normal ou mesmo o sexo oral? Há coisas que não se sentem, meu caro, gostam-se 🙂

    É como os pêlos, é fetiche 🙂

  18. esta conversa é do melhor. adorei os comentarios. e concordo ctg Dora. pode não importar o tamanho para o desempenho ms é óbvio k temos mais pica com uma grande. e sim 14cm é pekena. aliás, nem conta…lol

  19. Honestamente, nunca me ponho a perguntar quanto mede. 😛

    Se 15/16 é o normal 14 é pequeno? É 1 cm mulher! ahahah 11 ou 12 é pequeno.

    Eu sei que ando agradada com o que tenho e que tenho tido sorte em conhecer machame bem servido… mas devido ao trauma da experiência com o "mais grande", prefiro médios mas trabalhadores. ahahah

  20. então e, se tiveres q escolher, preferes grosso ou comprido?

    é q as criticas que tenho são sempre do género "ah, não tem 21 cm (tem uns 16, vá) mas ao menos é grosso, até custa a entrar, fico toda rota"…

  21. Opa ter uma demasiado grande ou com diâmetro demasiado grande é muito pouco confortável…acho que não basta mesmo ter pila grande, um gajo que saiba o que faz e tenha atitude pode ter uma não muito grande e leva-nos à lua…acreditem em mim :p!

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    Преподаватель нескольких университетов, попавший в сталинские лагеря, и там умудрился обучать математике на куске мыла.
    Битву русских дружин и монголо-татар возле леса отмечают сразу в трёх селениях.
    Индонезийской закуской начиняют пирожки, посыпают рис и кладут в лапшу и супы.
    Свадьба английского рыцаря стала причиной войны между двумя могущественными родами.

    arbeca

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